Last night, we were out at the local mall picking up a few items for the munchkin's birthday (specifically, gifts for my parents to give her since my father is the only one who drives in that relationship, and he's not interested in a mall trip under the best of circumstances, let alone surgical recovery) when we stopped at Laura Secord to check out their Easter chocolate offerings.
Crazy Life by Toad The Wet Sprocket
While we were there, the munchkin "discovered" a basket full of dark chocolate marshmallow bunnies - the perfect gift for the Easter Bunny. The only kind of chocolate that the Easter Bunny would like.
We explained that, in fact, the Easter Bunny does not eat chocolate, and would much prefer the apple she had already purchased for the rodent earlier this week.
This did not go over so well. The munchkin would not take no for an answer, and when it became clear to her that perseverance would not be rewarded in this instance, she literally went nuts. She, quite simply, lost her shit.
Oh, and now seems like a good time to mention that the basket? Was on a glass shelf.
Down came the shelf.
Out poured the wrapped bunnies.
Fortunately, the shelf did not break, and few bunnies were harmed.
We apologized profusely and took her out of the store, to a bench nearby. We talked to her and explained what she did was wrong. Then I returned to settle up the damages, and learned that she wasn't the first kid to do this (then why is that shelf still there if kids knock it all the time?) and that I didn't need to pay for any destroyed bunnies.
We then made the munchkin apologize to the store clerk herself, but that served little purpose as all three women in the store thought she was adorable in her contrition and smiled at her.
I think I was more bothered by this than MTM; at least I verbalized my issue more forcefully. It's not so much that I was embarrassed (although admittedly I was), but more that I know she is beyond that. I know that she can be reasoned with and can understand what she is doing and the repercussions of those actions. And when she appears to choose not to follow the right path, I find it frustrating.
My wife said that she's three (just about) and that these things happen. But I just feel differently. Maybe I'm expecting too much from her?
8 comment:
I haven't had the pleasure of meeting three just yet but I've met that side of two. Expectations are so very hard - some days she astounds me, others she makes me go "YOU KNOW BETTER GAHHHH!". Parenting is tough.
Oh and I'm glad no glass was broken.
It's tough, because even though you know she is capable of more, she is still just a child with little control over her emotions. Believe me, I am certain that one day my child will make money on Broadway, so I know how horrible the dramatics and public tantrums can be.
However, sometimes PEOPLE in general make the wrong mistakes, act on impulse, without clearly thinking their actions through, and I'm talking about you and me, and any other grown adult who has eve "lost their shit" - the only difference is she is 3. There's no excuse for us.
It's okay. She'll learn to control herself better and you handled the situation great.
I think all too often we lose sight that our little ones are people firstly, no different than you and me, and sometimes, whether it be a chocolate bunny or someone knocking into me and my child or slamming the door in my face, we lose our shit.
AT least they didn't think she was cute enough to deserve a treat (namely one of the bunnies).
When Moe was 2 1/2 ish, we were in a coffee shop and one of the girls had to use a window. As I was helping Meenie, I saw out of the corner of my eye, Moe looking at a mirror. The next thing I saw was said mirror (7 feet tall, 4 feet wide) topple onto Moe, knocking her over and shattering all over the bathroom. Luckily, she got a few scrapes, but it scared the crap out of me. The mirror, had been just propped on the wall of the bathroom that was undergoing maintenance. Needless, to say, we haven't been back to said coffee shop since (which is a shame, as it's a very quint little shop and I love the atmosphere and coffee.)
It's hard when they are three, but hang in there, four is a very pleasant age. I think they give you the two years following three before they slam you with six...
I'm with both of you on this one. Yeah, she's only three, and that is somewhat normal behaviour from a three year old, but -- it seems to me that you've taught her right from wrong quite well, and she should have known better.
I think you handled the situation well. You had her apologize and told her you were upset by her behaviour, which is what I would have done in your shoes too. Good on ya, SFD.
Oh I have been there.
Three is a funny age for us. It's when kids really assert themselves. Of course you should expect good behaviour, but I think this is really typical.
I love that you made her apologize. I would have done the same thing.
Been a lurker here for a little while now and just want to say that I enjoy your blog and your honesty about life and parenting and all that entails.
I think you and your wife handled it correctly in that you removed her from the store, didn't give in, talked to her about it and had her apologize. More parents out there should do that but sad to say many don't. Maybe because it does take time to stop everything (Meaning, what we are doing)and deal with it correctly. Good parents don't try to control their children into being little robots that perform and never think for themselves...so even if you have trained your child to not act in such a way they are going to still test the waters. I like to call moments like you had as a "teachable moment" and these moments usually aren't too fun!
You taught your daughter important lessons today so you should be proud of yourselves!
Three is so...random.
She'll get it.
We struggle with similar things with our child. I get so angry because I know he KNOWS BETTER! I just keep setting the bar high - because I refuse to lower it. Hang in there.
I love the new look by the way!
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